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Potty Training 101: Pre-training is Important! Copyright © 2003 Helen Davis All Rights Reserved. When I first began to teach our oldest, I put her in "panties" and thought she would know what to do.  Then I began to rearrange our living room!  Well surprise - guess what happened.  She had an accident and I was in the middle of moving shelves! I over-reacted and boy, was she confused!  After 3 weeks of frustration, I put the panties and the potty-chair away and told her I had made a mistake and I was  going to take some time to learn how to teach her to go potty.  Then we would start over. Since that time, as a daycare provider for over 20 years, I have been in on the potty training of many a child. I want to share some of the insights I have gained with you. It is important to keep potty training, like anything else, in perspective.  It is important, but it doesn't have to take such an important spot that nothing else gets done. Keep your sense of humor! It is also very helpful that mom, dad and any siblings are in on the process.  You can keep things upbeat by thinking "no more diapers, no more diapers, no more diapers". It can be a fun time. I think there is a lot accomplished in the pre-training time that really helps make the actual potty training time much more effective.  Look for the following physical signs that are indicators that your child is ready to be potty-trained: Ability to hold urine for longer periods of time.   Ability to follow 1-2 directions.   Knows when urination or defecation is about to start. When your child begins to show these signs, begin having practice sessions pulling up their pants whenever they get dressed.  It is sometimes time consuming, but it is important that they learn how to pull up their pants by themselves. Build some positive anticipation.  Be encouraging about potty training. "Tommy, pretty soon I'm going to teach you how to put your potty in the toilet just like Daddy.  You will be a big boy and won't need diapers any more". Think no more diapers, no more diapers, no more diapers! Begin to develop your plan.  There are several different opinions of how to potty train. However, it is important that you modify your method to what is most effective for you, your child and your family. There is the Potty train in less than a day method. This can work well but it is very intense and can be overwhelming. Another method is to only potty train when you are at home method.  This takes longer but it isn't so intense. Children are very different in how they respond to potty training.  Some are very motivated by the offering of treats.  Some could care less about treats but responds to celebration by the family.  Some find it a fun challenge and almost train themselves.  Others use it as an opportunity to throw tantrums and control the situation. When you begin to think about potty training you need to think what kind of rewards your child would really like and what kind of learner your child is.  If the child is looking forward to becoming a "big kid" and is excited about new skills and responsibilities, that will be a big plus. It is helpful to teach the child the necessary steps with a doll or by showing the child the process by example.  Daddy's should take their sons into the bathroom and show them just how it's done.  Mom's can do the same with their daughters. Have them practice taking down and pulling up their pants. It helps if they grab both the front and the back of their pants. Those little buns can be big obstacles! Get the necessary equipment together.  Cotton underwear is best for training.  Pull-ups are wonderful for trips to the store when an accident would really be a problem but the pull-ups don't let the children actually "feel" the consequences when they have an accident.   When you actually decide it is time to really train your child it is helpful to spend some focused time with them.  Plan for an initial 2 to 4 hours to kick off the event.  One of the parents should take the siblings away from the house for a few hours so that the other can spend some concentrated time teaching the basics.   Once your child shows that they are ready by: Showing the physical indicators And you have evaluated your child and your family's circumstances and have come up with a plan You are ready to begin the actual potty training process.  My next article will focus on what this entails. Helen Davis is an early childhood expert. Her mother founded and ran the famous Sunny Beam Nursery School on Mercer Island, WA. She inherited her mother's gifting and love of children and has been involved in early childhood care for over 20 years.  To read more of her articles, visit our Article Page and look in the Potty Training section.

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